Dream with me?

Tales Of Gyrtu 11 de Junho de 2009

Filed under: sketches,WIPs,Works — blackseyr @ 02:24
Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

introduction WIP

Here’s a work I’ve been putting my hand on too slowly… like… I think I started this more than a year ago… and it has already suffered so many changes you won’t believe. And the changes will keep on, until I decide to actually finish this… T__T Its taking WAY TOO long…

Queen and Bodyguard copy

And here’s a sketch I did moments ago.
I liked it enough to share here already.
Maybe I’ll finish it. If I have the patience…

These are my OC’s from Tales of Gyrtu Vaeros (the girl) and Cale (the guy).
This story and characters are very dear to me, and have a lot of meaning into them, so please do not steal them.

For those who already know them, you might find those outfits weird. Well… they are are not always on their regular outfit… The one that Vaeros is wearing is her Queen outfit. *I know that it’s a little…stripped for a queen… but I just don’t care!*
Cale’s outfit is not the King’s.. since in here he’s not yet the king. 😉 He’s just a the personal Queen’s Bodyguard. And yeah… he got a sleeve ripped off. And also his hair is longer, and kind of different.

Anyhow…
I should keep on sketching… maybe I’ll grab onto the comic itself. 😉
And then, once I feel ready and inspired again, I shall finish properly my trades *which WILL close for a long while*

Wish me luck!

 

My sketch blog 10 de Junho de 2009

Up until now this has been my personal blog where I would ramble about anything I wanted *I will still ramble… yet only in portuguese…* But I decided that I should also make this blog my Sketch Blog, where you can follow my works in progress or simply unfinished works that I’ll probably never touch ever again…

Hope you guys enjoy this.

And for the portuguese people that might see my rambling…

Lamento… mas é para isso que este blog foi feito inicialmente, e é a minha forma de me exprimir.

AS for now I don’t have any sketch to post, but I shall work on those… I haven’t been drawing since March or so… so you’ll probably find some more flaws in my work, and more things to be improved. Please bear with me, and give me your support. ^_^

You can start by voting on my poll! 😀


Anyhow… I need to get back to my trades, and I need to gather money to send those commissions..and also to keep on track on taking care of my health that hasn’t been so good lately… T___T *had a crisis again today…*

If you want to help me, you can always commission me…

I shall leave here (as well as on my dA page) the pricing list. (keep in mind that those are only estimates of prices… it can vary depending on the time and difficulty of the work…)

:bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::kitty: WEURA-CHAN’S JOURNAL :kitty::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue:

:bulletgreen::bulletgreen::pointr:THE BORING STUFF:_____________________________________________

*I reserve the right to decline any commission request without question.

*I reserve the right to adjust the pricing on a request before I start the commission, depending on difficulty / time scale etc.

*You are free to use your commissioned piece as you see fit, for layouts etc. You are not required to link back or credit, but it would be appreciated. However, you may NOT claim the piece as your own. I reserve the rights to the artwork and you may not make money from it.

* Copyright of artwork creation will be mine, however, you still hold the main copyright over your original characters. Please do not remove / modify the watermarks / signatures on the artwork.

* I have the right to use your commission art for non-profit purposes (ie: advertise / promoting the site / service etc).

* I will show sketches of your commission before I proceed so you can still tell me to fix things up. After I start working on them, no adjustment shall be done.

* The artworks will be either hosted on DA, my website, or posted straight to you via e-mail, depending on your choice of receiving your commission, and my availability.

* Additional cost will be included if you wish to have the original artwork (in CG if I have sketched first on paper, and also applicable to the study sketches for either type of commission) mailed to you (a.k.a postal service).

* Do not expect your commission to be done so soon.
This is important because I am usually occupied with other works. If you need your commission to be done by a certain date, ask earlier and notify me in your first request note.

* Payment will only be asked after the product is done and before it is submitted to you. (payments via normal mail or transference via paypal (veraluisapeneda@gmail.com) Which means, you’ll be able to see the commission before you pay, but you will only have it AFTER you paid.

* In any event that should you wish to cancel your commission when I have already started it, I have the full right to sell it to anyone else. If it has your original character, I will include the character owner’s credit to you.

*Regular commissions are NOT to be used for anything like:
Book illustrations, covers, or any other publishing that depicts the artwork or for any profit you may hope to make.
Regular commissions cover NON-commercial use only. You may not make prints of my work to sell. I still hold legal rights to the art. Commissioning me means that you are agreeing to those terms.

*All commissions are NON-refundable.

Please consider this matter carefully before deciding on buying a commission.

:bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue:

:bulletgreen::bulletgreen::pointr:Here’s what I do accept as a commission, and what I do not (since there are things that i can’t draw, or don’t accept at all…):

Will do:
:bulletgreen: Original characters, Fanarts (not all. Please ask me first…)
:bulletgreen: Chibis, Cute characters
:bulletgreen: Erotica type pictures, Mature content (but still, ask me first, it also depends on what you ask)
:bulletgreen: Portraits
:bulletgreen: Mystic animals (although not too furry… ^^; )

Will NOT do:
:bulletred: Mechas, Vehicles, Robots, Armours (if too complex), Firearms
:bulletred: Anthro
:bulletred: Comics (I might think about it, but believe me it’ll be WAY too expensive…)
:bulletred: Overlay complex characters, realism (unless you want a portrait), Abstract
:bulletred: Disfigurement / Distortion / Pedophilia, etc…
(things I can’t tolerate)

:bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue:

Now that you know what I will accept and not accept doing, I’ll go to the prices list.
These are just rough estimate of what I might ask, still, bear in mind that these are only examples. I am always open to different kinds of character work and can work out pricing with you as such, depending on what you want.
Some variants that factor into the price are: level of complexity and detail, medium (color, line art, pencil), number of characters, background, etc. Once you have described what you want, I will then give you an estimate of what it will cost, based on these factors.
I typically prefer to take payments for my work through paypal (veraluisapeneda@gmail.com), and will send you the finished product as a high resolution JPG file (in case it’s a CG)/the original work after I receive the payment.
Have in mind that the pricing that follows does not include the shipment price, that I might ask in addition to the commission itself if you want the original sent to you (I will probably ask for $10 for the shipment as being A4, and $40 for A3 size).

:bulletgreen::bulletgreen::pointr:PRICING_____________________________________________

All of the following prices are rough estimates. Be aware that the prices may increase depending on what you’re asking for – detail, time scale, difficulty, etc.

All of the prices are listed in European currency – € and American dollars – $

:bulletblue::bulletblue::pointr:Traditional Works

BUST:
:bulletred::bulletred: pencil/skecth €10 = $15
:bulletred::bulletred: inks/colors €15 = $22

FULL BODY:
:bulletred::bulletred:pencil/skecth €20 = $30
:bulletred::bulletred: inks/colors €25 = $37

ADDITIONAL CHARACTERS:
:bulletred::bulletred:pencil/skecth + €5 = $7
:bulletred::bulletred: inks/colors + €8 = $12

:bulletblue::bulletblue::pointr:CG (DIGITAL WORKS)

The prices for CG’S are ROUGH guides, They will varey depending on detail, time scale, difficulty etc.

:bulletred::bulletred:BUST (WAIST UP): €65 = $95 / extra character + €50 = $73

:bulletred::bulletred:FULL BODY: €85 = $124 / extra character + €65 = $95

:bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue:

:bulletgreen::bulletgreen::pointr:If you are interested in commissioning me for this kind of work, you are welcome to contact me either by email (veraluisapeneda@gmail.com). Please in the subject write Commission, or I won’t open it.

Or via deviantART Note.

Note (e-mail) me with your request:

Your:
Email address.
Form of payment.
Type of commission. Bust, waist up etc.

Most Importantly…
Give me as much info on what you’d like as possible, If it’s your own character for example…

Name, age, Image references, personality traits, bad habits, specific tattoos, earrings, clothing, body type, ANYTHING that is relevant.
Colours for hair, clothing, eyes, or any other important feature.
I need as much info as possible to work from, to make sure you like the end result. If I am able to work on your commission, I will respond with further questions and details.

Thank you for your time reading this info.

:bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue:

EXTRA INFO

I’m sorry if you think I’m asking too much for my works, but I don’t have a job now, and I desperately need money… I want to go live to Switzerland and I need money to go there, to establish a life and to keep with my studies.
These prices were suggested by a person that usually buys this kind of stuff. That person gave a deep look at my works and lent me a hand to do the pricing list, since I don’t have a single clue for how much I should sell a work… And since I don’t want to rob nor to be robbed I asked for his help.
I hope you understand…

Thank you once again for reading…

:bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::kitty: WEURA-CHAN’S JOURNAL :kitty::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue:

:bulletgreen::bulletgreen::pointr:THE BORING STUFF:_____________________________________________

*I reserve the right to decline any commission request without question.

*I reserve the right to adjust the pricing on a request before I start the commission, depending on difficulty / time scale etc.

*You are free to use your commissioned piece as you see fit, for layouts etc. You are not required to link back or credit, but it would be appreciated. However, you may NOT claim the piece as your own. I reserve the rights to the artwork and you may not make money from it.

* Copyright of artwork creation will be mine, however, you still hold the main copyright over your original characters. Please do not remove / modify the watermarks / signatures on the artwork.

* I have the right to use your commission art for non-profit purposes (ie: advertise / promoting the site / service etc).

* I will show sketches of your commission before I proceed so you can still tell me to fix things up. After I start working on them, no adjustment shall be done.

* The artworks will be either hosted on DA, my website, or posted straight to you via e-mail, depending on your choice of receiving your commission, and my availability.

* Additional cost will be included if you wish to have the original artwork (in CG if I have sketched first on paper, and also applicable to the study sketches for either type of commission) mailed to you (a.k.a postal service).

* Do not expect your commission to be done so soon.
This is important because I am usually occupied with other works. If you need your commission to be done by a certain date, ask earlier and notify me in your first request note.

* Payment will only be asked after the product is done and before it is submitted to you. (payments via normal mail or transference via paypal (veraluisapeneda@gmail.com) Which means, you’ll be able to see the commission before you pay, but you will only have it AFTER you paid.

* In any event that should you wish to cancel your commission when I have already started it, I have the full right to sell it to anyone else. If it has your original character, I will include the character owner’s credit to you.

*Regular commissions are NOT to be used for anything like:
Book illustrations, covers, or any other publishing that depicts the artwork or for any profit you may hope to make.
Regular commissions cover NON-commercial use only. You may not make prints of my work to sell. I still hold legal rights to the art. Commissioning me means that you are agreeing to those terms.

*All commissions are NON-refundable.

Please consider this matter carefully before deciding on buying a commission.

:bulletgreen::bulletgreen::pointr:Here’s what I do accept as a commission, and what I do not (since there are things that i can’t draw, or don’t accept at all…):

Will do:
:bulletgreen: Original characters, Fanarts (not all. Please ask me first…)
:bulletgreen: Chibis, Cute characters
:bulletgreen: Erotica type pictures, Mature content (but still, ask me first, it also depends on what you ask)
:bulletgreen: Portraits
:bulletgreen: Mystic animals (although not too furry… ^^; )

Will NOT do:
:bulletred: Mechas, Vehicles, Robots, Armours (if too complex), Firearms
:bulletred: Anthro
:bulletred: Comics (I might think about it, but believe me it’ll be WAY too expensive…)
:bulletred: Overlay complex characters, realism (unless you want a portrait), Abstract
:bulletred: Disfigurement / Distortion / Pedophilia, etc…
(things I can’t tolerate)

:bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue:

Now that you know what I will accept and not accept doing, I’ll go to the prices list.
These are just rough estimate of what I might ask, still, bear in mind that these are only examples. I am always open to different kinds of character work and can work out pricing with you as such, depending on what you want.
Some variants that factor into the price are: level of complexity and detail, medium (color, line art, pencil), number of characters, background, etc. Once you have described what you want, I will then give you an estimate of what it will cost, based on these factors.
I typically prefer to take payments for my work through paypal (veraluisapeneda@gmail.com), and will send you the finished product as a high resolution JPG file (in case it’s a CG)/the original work after I receive the payment.
Have in mind that the pricing that follows does not include the shipment price, that I might ask in addition to the commission itself if you want the original sent to you (I will probably ask for $10 for the shipment as being A4, and $40 for A3 size).

:bulletgreen::bulletgreen::pointr:PRICING_____________________________________________

All of the following prices are rough estimates. Be aware that the prices may increase depending on what you’re asking for – detail, time scale, difficulty, etc.

All of the prices are listed in European currency – € and American dollars – $

:bulletblue::bulletblue::pointr:Traditional Works

BUST:
:bulletred::bulletred: pencil/skecth €10 = $15
:bulletred::bulletred: inks/colors €15 = $22

FULL BODY:
:bulletred::bulletred:pencil/skecth €20 = $30
:bulletred::bulletred: inks/colors €25 = $37

ADDITIONAL CHARACTERS:
:bulletred::bulletred:pencil/skecth + €5 = $7
:bulletred::bulletred: inks/colors + €8 = $12

:bulletblue::bulletblue::pointr:CG (DIGITAL WORKS)

The prices for CG’S are ROUGH guides, They will varey depending on detail, time scale, difficulty etc.

:bulletred::bulletred:BUST (WAIST UP): €65 = $95 / extra character + €50 = $73

:bulletred::bulletred:FULL BODY: €85 = $124 / extra character + €65 = $95

:bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue:

:bulletgreen::bulletgreen::pointr:If you are interested in commissioning me for this kind of work, you are welcome to contact me either by email (veraluisapeneda@gmail.com). Please in the subject write Commission, or I won’t open it.

Or via deviantART Note.

Note me with your request:

Your:
Email address.
Form of payment.
Type of commission. Bust, waist up etc.

Most Importantly…
Give me as much info on what you’d like as possible, If it’s your own character for example…

Name, age, Image references, personality traits, bad habits, specific tattoos, earrings, clothing, body type, ANYTHING that is relevant.
Colours for hair, clothing, eyes, or any other important feature.
I need as much info as possible to work from, to make sure you like the end result. If I am able to work on your commission, I will respond with further questions and details.

Thank you for your time reading this info.

:bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue::bulletblue:

EXTRA INFO

I’m sorry if you think I’m asking too much for my works, but I don’t have a job now, and I desperately need money… I want to go live to Switzerland and I need money to go there, to establish a life and to keep with my studies.
These prices were suggested by a person that usually buys this kind of stuff. That person gave a deep look at my works and lent me a hand to do the pricing list, since I don’t have a single clue for how much I should sell a work… And since I don’t want to rob nor to be robbed I asked for his help.
I hope you understand…

Thank you once again for reading…

 

Trabalho vendido por €300 28 de Dezembro de 2008

colored-full

Aqui está mais recente desenho por encomenda que fiz.

Totalmente pintado em aguarelas, formato A3, e demorou cerca de (juntando as horas de trabalho) uma semana a completar desde o esboço ao trabalho final. ^^

Quem estiver interessado contacte-me: veraluisapeneda@gmail.com

 

2ª fase 10 de Julho de 2008

Filed under: Daylife — blackseyr @ 20:00
Tags: , ,

Como se já não me bastasse a 1ª fase de exames tenho que ir à 2ª fase de História da Cultura e das Artes.
Tive boas notas nos outros dois exames, mas esta estragou-me o bom-humor. 6. eramos 10 pessoas e nenhuma passou. A nota mais alta foi um 7, depois foi a minha nota, e o resto foi tudo de 6 para baixo… Das duas uma, ou o nosso professor era uma nódoa, ou o exame era muito dificil. Embora eu aponte para as duas. Puseram-nos perguntas de psicologia num exame de história da arte, e o nosso stor chegava a estar dias sem ir às aulas, ou então só nos marcava presença e mandava-nos embora, ou melhor…Chegar à aula e dizer-nos, durante uma semana ou mais, “Hoje não me apetece dar aula.” E com isto ficava a matéria para dar, que já estava pouco atrasada e muito mal explicada e compreendida para ser dada com dois dias de antecedência a um teste, onde chegavam a ser dadas 160 paginas em 180 minutos (duas aulas), para um teste. Ora… acho que assim ninguém fica preparado… e tanto era o nosso panico que iamos TODOS carregadinhos de cábulas até aos dentes para conseguirmos tirar pelo menos um 10….
Giro né? não… não é giro. Aquele homem ja nem devia dar aulas. Preparou-nos mal, e (já) não sabe dar aulas decentemente.

Graças a ele estou a estudar às cegas 6 livros equivalentes a dois anos de disciplina para um exame de 2 horas que vou ter dentro de uma semana, e ainda só li 1 dos 13 módulos que tenho para ler e saber…

Desejem-me sorte, que bem preciso dela.

Para cúmulo tenho a minha mãe à perna a por-me entre a espada e a parede sobre a minha ida para a Suíça… Agora diz-me que ou já tenho data marcada ou que tenho que me candidatar a uma universidade de cá. Ou seja, se ele só for depois da universidade começar, eu vou estar um ano cá e ele na suíça sozinho…

Já me conseguiu por ainda mais mal-humorada do que já ando. Depois diz que não me ando a alimentar bem, e não sei o quê. Só me sabe moer a cabeça…

Que nervos!

 

Mais problemas… 17 de Junho de 2008

Filed under: ramblings — blackseyr @ 23:00
Tags:

Como se já não me bastasse os idiotas do Health Club me terem ido debitar dinheiro à conta depois de eu suspender o meu contrato com eles, esse dinheiro ainda nao me foi devolvido. Dinheiro esse que PRECISO urgentemente. Garantiram-me que já tinham falado com o banco, e que neste passado dia 14 estaria tudo resolvido e que eu teria os 31,50€ de novo na minha conta… pois bem… é dia 17 e ainda nem o cheirei! Vou ter que ir lá armar escarcel outra vez.

E para melhorar as coisas, fui à Tiffosi antes de esta fechar para obras, para saber porque é que ainda não me tinham pago o meu subsidio de férias, visto que eu saí de lá a 31 de Janeiro…e estamos em Junho… :\ Como não estava presente a responsável de loja, pedi para que lhe entregassem recado. Disseram-me que sim senhora que lhe entregariam o recado e que ela logo que soubesse de alguma coisa me telefonaria… Pois bem, isto foi em inicios de Maio… esperei, e esperei… Entretanto aquilo entrou em obras e como é obvio eu não consegui entrar em conctacto com nenhuma delas, e ainda por cima não tenho o numero da empresa. Fui lá ontem para falar com a dita responsável de loja, que me disse que não lhe tinham dito nada… (hã… é só gente competente neste país… primeiro as brojeças do Health Club que depois de ter ido suspender o contracto me vao tirar o dinheiro à conta na mesma porque a incompetente que me atendeu se ESQUECEU – ora vejam só…- de avisar as colegas que entregam a papelada toda… e agora isto da Tiffosi…)

Ela foi ver se tinham recebido alguma coisa para mim, e nada. Disse-me então que iria telefonar para a empresa logo que a senhora que trata desses assuntos estivesse lá (ontem foi a folga dela) e que depois me diria qualquer coisa… Infelizmente hoje não ouvi o telefonema, e quando telefonei já lá não estava a responsavel de loja (sim, porque as outras empregadas nao sabiam de nada…)

Conclusão— estou desesperada por dinheiro, tenho contas para pagar e não sei como, e não consigo arranjar trabalho… >_< Bosta de vida…

 

…….. 4 de Maio de 2008

Filed under: Dreams — blackseyr @ 00:44

Ando estranha, desanimada e com uma necessidade extrema de uma grande reviravolta na minha vida.
Falta-me aquele brilhozinho nos olhos que antes tinha, como me disseram, não só uma, mas várias vezes…
Falta-me algo… não sei o quê…

Apoio naquilo que faço?
Um pouco de atenção para os meus trabalhos?
Sentir-me valorizada por aquilo que consigo fazer?
Ser encorajada a fazer mais e melhor?
Saudades de cantar?
Saudades de dançar ao som de Sygma Band?
Voltar a ter por perto quem se afastou? (fisica e/ou psicológicamente)
Ser compreendida?
Conseguir vencer pelo menos uma vez na vida?
Ter forças para mudar?

Sei lá… há tantas hipóteses… há tantas possibilidades… e será que mesmo que seja alguma delas me ajuda a melhorar?… não me parece…
Preciso mesmo de algo que me acalme o espírito. Ando sensivel. Por qualquer coisa me emociono e já tenho a cara coberta de lágrimas (alegria, emoção, felicidade, mas nunca tristeza… quando é por razões menos boas é por raiva ou desilusão…).
Um retiro espititual… um spa… o quer que seja que me ajude a acalmar…
O que me leva a pensar… não tenho pirlins para estas extravagâncias mencionadas… ou seja… aguento-me que me lixo…
As idas ao ginásio também já não ajudam… antes vinha de lá como nova, apesar de cansada, mas agora não… sinto-me desanimada na mesma. E ainda por cima parece que não obtenho resultados positivos. estou a engordar em vez de emagrecer… o que me leva a um ciclo vicioso de começar a rilhar mais, e isso não ajuda nada…
Estou FARTA destas minhas fases… Quero voltar a estar como estive o ano passado e o anterior por esta altura… Feliz, alegre e despreocupada… Não quero tantas dores de cabeça… Estou farta…
FARTA!

 

Lies… 30 de Abril de 2008

Filed under: Dreams — blackseyr @ 10:26

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

It’s hard to understand why someone lies when that’s completely uncalled for….
Then you ask: “Why did/do you lie to me?”
That person asks for forgiveness for lying to you, once again…and you forgive, to once again you hear a new lie… A lie that is hurting the lier the most— And the lier is your best friend… You want your friend to be happy, but still, the lier keeps on lying, more and more.

“Please… don’t lie to me… don’t lie to yourself..:” we ask counteless times.
Are those requests replied to? Are the efforts we put on our yearnings worth it?
we think they are, we make our best— We try hard. We try not to feel useless towards the lier in front of us… Useless…? Yeah… that’s the word. We’re useless to that person. It’s not our fault though…. It’s the lier’s fault. The lier doesn’t let us approach him, doesn’t allow us to aid the cause… The lier lies each day more and more… it vanishes in the lies the lier itself makes up. Thunder in the lier’s head anihilates his roots. Anihilates his real self. Anihilates the one we used to know… The liers true self lies somewhere else… lies in other heart… lies in other’s minds…

“WHY DON’T YOU SEE THAT?!?!?” we yell from our lungs. Still the lier seems def. The lier does not reply… he became dumb.

You became with, someone else, a refinement of what you were with me. You became a refinement of the one I met… I was happy to see you happy. To see you weren’t lying at that time. Someone else was also happy… Four girls in your life were happy for you… three of them were happy to see you happy, making someone happy… Someone that made us be four. Someone that saw and metthe refinement of what you were with me… Can’t you come back? Can’t you learn to fight? Can’t you find strenghts to fight for your happiness? Don’t you see…. you do HAVE to fight for happiness… Such thing does not come just by wishing it… happiness needs to be fought to have it… It needs to be seen as a goal, not as a selfproclaimed and already achived since the beginning.

Learn from what you already learnt before… You live from the little things in life… Someone else also does that… that’s your half of your life. The half you gave away so easily.
We don’t ask you to come back to that person… We ask you to find yourself again… to find your REAL self once again… You’re vanishing… you’re losing your roots… You’re not yourself anymore…

I miss my lil brother…. ;_;